Where can I meet good looking people to date?

Online dating without a doubt is the king. But how about other places to meet good looking people? Here are some tips to help you navigate through the dating maze.

Beach – Public beaches bring together a lot of single men and women with the most stunning bodies. Here are some tips for meeting good looking people on the beach.

If you are a girl, you really don’t need to do anything other than being yourself. All you need to do to meet great looking guys at a public beach is to simply show up. Find a good laying spot where groups of single men of appropriate age are hanging out. If you walk by those men to and from the ocean, I guarantee they’ll make all kinds of compliments even if you don’t glance at them. Don’t believe me? Try it! Here are the kinds of compliments I get from guys at a public beach, “I love your swimsuit”.

I get that all the time. I don’t think that men love my swimsuit. I think they love what’s underneath but that’s ok.

On my recent trip to Florida I spent several days at the beach. While I was enjoying the sun and all getting tanned, men came up to me in packs without any solicitation whatsoever and asked if they could get me anything, like drinks, food, etc. from the restaurant at the beach, which by the end of day got me pretty buzzed.

On the other hand, a public beach is a fabulous venue for your first date, and if the weather allows, you should go for it. In case the man you are meeting declines meeting you at a beach or take you there on your first date, you know he is hiding something.

Dance clubs – if you like dancing and can dance like no one is watching, as they say, then a dance club is a perfect venue for meeting hundreds of single men. Men love going to clubs for the sole purpose of picking up chicks, so it is a paradise for finding a date. If your favorite dance club has a little stage, get right on it. That way everyone sees you and you can see everyone. Then as soon as you step down for a drink of water, men will follow you in packs to buy you a drink. Another tip on meeting men at a dance club is if you notice an attractive guy you’d like to meet, simply look at him as if you were already engaged in a conversation. It’s a man’s character to buy a drink to any girl at a club even without a slight chance of a conversation after doing so. That way, if you do engage in a conversation after he’s offered to buy you a drink, he’ll be ecstatic.

Online Dating – I consider online dating to be the best place for meeting people. Dating sites offer a fantastic opportunity to select members not only by their education, job, marital status, number of children, but also by their looks. So, if you don’t find a man attractive, you just don’t respond to his e-mail. And if he bugs you too much, you can block him from contacting you ever again. That’s the beauty of online dating. Safe, secure, selective. Read my post about how to meet good looking people on a dating site

Once you have decided to try out online dating, you need to pick a dating site that will be most useful considering your needs. If you want to ultimately find a serious relationship, I recommend a mainstream dating site such as The #1 Site For Love It has been around for a long time and has built a solid reputation as a trustworthy dating site. Once you register on a dating site, read how to meet good looking men online.

Viewing Love as Investment

Meet Your Mr. Right

Why men don't talk about their feelings?

Fundamentally, men disclose less than women in nearly all situations. Generally, female to female self disclosure is the highest, male to male self disclosure is the lowest, and female to male self disclosure is in the middle. (Hill and Stull, 1987) Also, the relationship between the two people plays a large role in how much one self discloses. But generally, men don't express their feelings verbally out of fear of vulnerability that comes from it. Men are afraid they may get laughed at, scorned, hurt, rejected, or worst of all, fully accepted and loved. Then the woman will have all this power-the power of love to wield over their heads.

Jourard (a major player in self disclosure research) attributed this to the social roles of men and women:

"The male role requires men to appear tough, objective, striving, achieving, unsentimental, and emotionally unexpressive.. . . The male role, and the male's self-structure will not allow man to acknowledge or to disclose the entire breadth and depth of his inner experience to himself or to others. Man seems obliged, rather, to hide much of his real self—the ongoing flow of his spontaneous inner experience—from himself and from others. (Jourard, 1971, p. 35)"

Remember the "Hunter / Gatherer" Society? Men did the hunting, women did the gathering. Women chatted with one another during food gathering to signal that they were still there and alive, meaning that local leopard hadn't made lunch of them. Men, on the other hand, kept quiet on the hunt. Otherwise the hunted would hear them and leave for a safer place. Now women "gather" in supermarkets and at Macy's and spend hours doing it. When men hit Macy's, they're in and out in 10 minutes. Hunt shirt, find shirt, kill shirt, bring shirt home. However, there is a way men can be "primed" to disclose more. In one study, when men were given a survey measuring perceived self disclosure, they reported disclosing much less than women.

Yet, when men were asked to fill out a longer demographics questionnaire first which was in the essence self disclosing, they reported disclosing just as much as women did on the second questionnaire.

Thus, to get men to talk about more sensitive topics, get them talking about other things first, then slowly work your way into the target topic. Reassuring them about their social role not being compromised by self disclosure won't hurt either; let them know that talking about their feelings doesn't make them a wuss. To learn more about the way men think, sing up for a free newsletter by clicking here.

First Date and Beyond. Is he really interested or keeping you hanging on?

I recently received an e-mail from a young woman who is meeting men on a dating site and with her permission I am publishing it in this post.

"I met a guy on a dating site a while ago. We had dinner. He seemed interested. We had a good exchange and some good laughs. When he walked me to my car I made sure I told him I had a great time. So, he asked me if I wanted to do that again. I said yes. He said he would call.

Five days goes by. Five! He finally e-mailed. Not called, but e-mailed.

“I wanted to write to you earlier in the week but you had hidden your profile. I really enjoyed our date (though I'm still not sure if I was just the Monday menu or you are actually interested in seeing more of each other. You are very intelligent and quite charming and funny. If you would like to see each other again, just let me know.”

I write back:

“I am actually interested in seeing more of each other. I know guys have this three day calling rule, but disregarding it, please give me a call sometime.”

He writes back:

“I did think you weren't interested or I would have called earlier so I will give you a call today.”

He called back the following day. Here is the conversation:

He: “Hi, I was wondering if I could see you again.”
Me: “Sure, I would love to.”
He: “Are you sure?”
Me: “Of course!”
He: “I wasn’t sure if you were interested, or I would have called you sooner.”
Me: “Of course I am interested. I told you that.”
He: “Ok, let me figure out my schedule and I’ll give you a call tomorrow to set something up.”
Me: “Sounds good”

The following day, sure enough, he doesn’t call.
Not that I sit and wait. I figure out, this is kind of strange, but who knows what happened. Perhaps he is not all that interested or maybe he is having problems with his psycho ex-girlfriend. Again. Not my business to sit and analyze why he is not calling. Big deal! It was merely a first date.

A month goes by. He e-mails me again.
“Have you found anyone yet or are you just setting up dinner dates still? I enjoyed our date and one of these days would like to see you again but I've been really working hard.”

That starts getting annoying. Enough already! Fine, I write back:
“Considering the drive you may want to come out Saturday evening. I still have it open. Please, let me know fast, those spots fill up quickly.”

That was on Monday. He responds on Wednesday:
“Well if I do I can't drink more than one glass of anything. I was so tired last time that I was falling asleep at the wheel on the way home.”
What is that about? He approached me on a dating site, knowing that I live two hours away from where he lives. He was the one to maintain that the distance would not have been a problem. By the time he wrote to me I had already made plans, so I informed him of that.

He writes back:
“Well, if you're actually interested in seeing more of me (as in I'd hate just to be filler on the social schedule) let me know. You are a lot of fun to be around I think.”

This gets me more and more annoyed. But I don’t want to be snappy or rude. He actually seemed like a nice guy, but I just don’t understand his hesitation. He either wants to see me or he doesn’t. I respond: “I told you I wanted to see more of you, but you don't seem too motivated.” His response: “Sorry about not seeming too motivated. I do like you, but you shook my hand so formally at our date that I really didn't think you were interested at all. When you said you were interested in seeing me more I didn't really think you were. We are too far apart for me to waste both our time unless you are actually very interested in me. I rarely show how attracted I am to someone (so I'm told) though I think that it's really obvious.”

Me: “I like people with perseverance which you show lack of. Girls don't sit and wait for a dude to call. They move on. If a dude doesn't call early in the week, chances are she will get booked. I told you I was interested. What else do you want me to say? Do you anticipate love confession on the first date?”

Then she e-mailed me. Here is my response below.

“This sounds to me like he wants to keep you hanging just in case. Don’t you sometimes do it when you don’t really have strong chemistry with a man, but want to keep him around just in case nothing better comes up and you don’t want to end up without a date on a Friday night? Sounds to me like while he is dating other girls, he may be unsure if there is anyone he may be interested in and while it doesn’t sound like he is head over heels in love with you, he is still considering you as an option No.2

I am not sure if this is the position you want to be. It’s your call. But I suggest that if he doesn’t stop dragging this out right now, cut him off and do not respond until he actually calls you or e-mails you with a firm date and time for a second date.

On the other hand, he may have self-esteem problems, emotional baggage, insecuries and such. In any case, it sounds like it has been too long and you have said numerous times that you were interested in him, so he should not feel intimidated.”

From 60 Minutes Correspondent Andy Rooney (CBS)

As I grow in age, I value women over 40 most of all. Here are just a few reasons why:

A woman over 40 will never wake you in the middle of the night and ask, 'What are you thinking?' She doesn't care what you think.

If a woman over 40 doesn't want to watch the game, she doesn't sit around whining about it. She does something she wants to do, and it's usually more interesting.

Women over 40 are dignified. They seldom have a screaming match with you at the opera or in the middle of an expensive restaurant. Of course, if you deserve it, they won't hesitate to shoot you if they think they can get away with it.

Older women are generous with praise, often undeserved. They know what it's like to be unappreciated.

Women get psychic as they age. You never have to confess your sins to a woman over 40.

Once you get past a wrinkle or two, a woman over 40 is far sexier than her younger counterpart.
Older women are forthright and honest. They'l l tell you right off that you are a jerk if you are acting like one. You don't ever have to wonder where you stand with her.

Yes, ! we praise women over 40 for a multitude of reasons. Unfortunately, it's not reciprocal. For every stunning, smart, well-coiffed, hot woman over 40, there is a bald, paunchy relic in yellow pants making a fool of himself with some 22-year old waitress. Ladies, I apologize. For all those men who say, 'Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?', her e's an update for you. Nowadays 80% of women are against marriage. Why? Because women realize it's not worth buying an entire pig just to get a little sausage!

Worst Dating Site Profile Headlines

I just couldn’t resist. This is the price of FREE. I was compelled to check out dating site forums. If you don’t know, there it is a completely free dating site and if you look around my blog, there is a banner for that web site here somewhere.

Anyways, I have known about this site and I actually met a couple of people on it. The first guy was actually cute, but sort of hmmmmm, how can I put it….well, anyway. The second guy turned out to be a stalker very fast, after like date number two.

Anyway, as soon as I typed in the URL of the free online dating site I was referring to, I was presented a number of dating site profiles. I thought the headlines were absolutely hilarious. Provided that I have previously written an article about the best online dating profile headlines, I decided to write one about how not to write a dating site profile headline. In doing this, I departed from the actual online dating site profile headlines I found on the free online dating site.

“Tired Of Being Stood Up” - this is classic. Who would want to go out with someone who gets stood up on a regular basis?

“Trying Again” - this just sounds too desperate. We already know that if you identified yourself as divorced, you have probably had at least one relationship. No need to specifically state it in your dating profile headline.

“Hi There”, “Hi”, “Hello” - this kind of a headline sends a message that the person who posted this online dating site profile can’t identify him or herself as anything. C’mon people, be more creative than that. You are trying to catch people’s attention. Be original!

Than again, there are a lot of dating site profile headlines that have the word “honest” in the headline, for instance, “Looking for an honest man”, “Looking for an honest fun guy”, “Honest people only” etc. Those dating profiles could be found on men’s and women’s profiles. Well, for one, it says that the man or the woman posting this kind of a dating site profile headline has most likely been with a liar and not only that, but he or she also has baggage, which follows from her hopeless desire to find someone “honest”. Do you really think that a single person who is going to lie to you in a potential future relationship stumbling across your online dating site profile is going to stop and think, hmmm, I am a liar? so I guess I’ll pass onto the next dating profile.

However, this kids of a dating site headline sends red flags immediately by showing that you are most likely jaded, used and abused in the past, with issues related to your failed relationship.

Than there are dating site profile headlines typed in ALL CAPS, or worse yet, a mixture of cApiTaL and sMalL letters.

There are also many dating site profile headlines comprised of the word “just” and either “looking”, “checking it out”, “checking out this site”, etc. This kind of a headline sends a massage that, for one, you may not be very smart, since you have nothing else to say, or are just not very serious about finding someone on a dating site anyway, and thus are not serious about dating.

Overall, it seems that at least seventy percent of the free online dating site profiles have the world “looking” in the headline. I think the days of the Internet dating infancy are over and this is the time to become more creative in posting a dating site profile.

If you want to read my post How To Write a Catchy Headline for Your Online Dating Profile, click on the highlighted link.

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