My readers love sending me their questions related to online dating. Usually after a man or a woman has been on a dating site for some time, they start having questions related to their experiences with onine dating. Here is where my advice comes in handy.
I love this e-mail I got from one of my subscribers (by the way, if you want to subscribe to my feed, there is a subscription button somewhere on this blog, just scroll down). Here is what he writes:
Hi Elaine,
I have been itching to ask you the million dollar question. I have been on Match.Com for a little over 7 months now. I have noticed many of the girls that I had emailed, many of them according to my standard were not only beautiful but their profiles were an 11 out of 10. Meaning no baggage, great education so on and so forth if you know what I mean. I see that many of them are still online showing that they are still actively looking. Based on my own statistic I would say over 90% of them are still searching. How can you tell me that these girls have not been able to find a guy yet even though they get tons of emails everyday plus they could literally could go out with any guy they wanted? Honestly, I find that to be baffling! I would really love to get your input on this one when you have some time.
Sincerely,
StillLooking
Dear StillLooking,
That is a lot easier than you think. Think about it; a woman is beautiful, educated, articulate, makes a lot of money, has no baggage, has friends to socialize with, she has everything she needs - money to play, people to socialize with, and her life is complete. Unless she wants a child, why on earth does she need a man?
Do you think a woman like that wants to find one consistent person to be with? Hell NO! Last thing she wants is to get involved with somebody else's drama and baggage.
Women who are independent do not need a man.
Those who want a child want a man extremely good looking (good genes for the child), good income (for future child support) and lots of assets. I am telling you this because I know a lot of good looking rich single women. They have part-time boyfriends who keep them company in social gatherings, but that is about the extent that they need men.
Women who are seriously looking for relationships are either looking to better their financial situation or to have a child. This is the whole truth since the beginning of the earth. Man - provider for the family. That is his sole function as far as a woman is concerned. If a woman can provide for herself, she has no use for a man.
Sincerely,
Elaine (AKA Internet Dating Tips)
To elaborate further on this, I would like to summarize the feedback I have received from many men who are single and dating online. Besides the obviously unattractive, needy women that every dating site always has, there are several categories of actually attractive women on a given online dating site. Those categories include:
1. Women who want to get married and have a child or two (magical number is two). Those are women in their twenties (usually mid to late twenties), and thirties. They have decent but not great jobs and they want a guy with money, good looks and who is ready to commit and have a family. Those girls do not waste time with men who are not commitment material.
2. Then there are women in their thirties (the divorcees) who have been married, have had kids, have gotten divorced and are now looking for a man to pay for all of that.
3. Then there are also women who are in their late thirties or early forties, who are successful, childless, and want a “sperm donor”. They want family and children, and the status of a married woman appeals to them. Those women are extremely choosy when it comes to men. They know what they are worth and are looking for a worthy man. They are extremely hard to satisfy because they want a prize – a complete package. A man who falls short of their lofty expectations has no chance with a woman like those.
4. Finally, there are cougars – rich ladies who like to date younger guys. Those ladies like the companionship and sex they receive from a younger man, as well as having their ego boosted from being seen with a hot younger hunk. Those ladies have money, grown children, and generally have their lives together. They have no expectations of a man, besides having one around to satisfy certain needs. Because they have money to spend, cougars usually take good care of themselves to ensure they look good for their age.
Sounds familiar? Ever met a woman from one or several of these categories? Write me an e-mail and share your story. And don’t forget to come back to this blog to read my upcoming posts.
Saturday, July 5, 2008
Online Dating Questions
Best Dating Site Reviews
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Great Expectations is very reasonably priced compare to other dating sites, which makes it a very cost-effective way of meeting singles online. Additionally, this dating site allows the increasingly popular connection by telephone service, which gets you a real person’s voice before you decide to exchange actual telephone numbers.
Creating a profile is free as well as “showing interest” in other members, which sends them an email saying that you are interested in them, a lot like a “wink” on other dating sites. Responding to e-mail that paying members send to you is also free. With a paid membership you can initiate email and use the instant messenger feature.
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According to many reviews, Lavalife.com has features and fun approach that sets it apart from many other online dating sites. Lavalife.com lets users choose between three options: dating, relationships and intimate encounters. You can create a separate profile for each department. Unlike Match.com |
Women who are seriously looking for relationships are either looking to better their financial situation or to have a child
ReplyDeleteWow you sure have women figured out don't you. Did it occur to you that it might be for sexual gratification or maybe just for commpanionship. To place all women in such a narrow lens is truly essentialist.
As a successful professional woman with a child, family close by, good friends, and all of the things you describe as reasons a woman doesn't "need" a man, I have to disagree. That might seem strange, since I've been single for four years and haven't even considered dating, but human nature is what it is--whether you want to attribute the natural order of things to God or biology or magnetic waves in the air, human beings are predisposed to operate as couples, and men and women to complement one another and live and act as a unit. No amount of other success/happiness/activity changes that.
ReplyDelete