He broke up with me. What to do?

Is it supposed to hurt when someone breaks up with you? From what I hear breaking up with your boyfriend or girlfriend is a painful experience. You have a lot invested in your relationship. You’ve spent time together and you probably have lots of fond memories. You hear a song on the radio that reminds you of romantic times spent together, walking on the beach under the moonlight, cuddling by the fireplace on a rainy night, spending a vacation together at a romantic spot, and many other things that you have done together as a couple. Those things are painful. Those memories are precious and it is hard to accept that there will no longer be precious moments spent with your ex. Perhaps you are still in love with your ex and want to get him back

But sometimes a break up could actually be a relief. If your relationship went sour a long time ago, a break up may be a great thing to have in your life. Perhaps you weren’t meant to be together and you need to look at a break up as a new phase in your life. Perhaps you need to take time off and take care of yourself; evaluate what it is that you want in your life for yourself and evaluate what you want your next relationship to be when you are ready. If you were not successful in making your relationship with your ex work, don’t blame yourself. That doesn’t mean you or him/her is a bad person. That just means that person was in your life for a reason. And that reason is you. See, I firmly believe that every relationship that the universe sends us is there for a reason. Each relationship brings something different and allows us to grow. And sometimes, it’s not even the relationship itself that makes us grow, it’s what did not work in the relationship and the hard awakening of a break up that makes us think, maybe I need to work on myself first and strive to become a better person, the best person I could be. And maybe my ex was meant to visit my life for a brief moment so that I could learn to be a better person. Maybe that was his sole purpose in my life?

Not every relationship is meant to be forever. Some relationships are only there as a preparation stage for something more, something substantial. Think about it; what if in the next six months you meet the love of your life? And your previous relationship, the one that didn’t work out and ended in a break up was only so that you could prepare yourself for the relationship of your life. Perhaps you have learned something about yourself from the other person’s perspective that is so eye-opening that you will try and do your best to become a better person; a person who will be right for the next one you meet.

So, what should you do meanwhile? First, check out my break up tips “What to do when your boyfriend dumps you”. Those are humorous, take them with a grain of salt, but as they say there is a ring of truth in every joke. Secondly, work on your self-image and self-confidence. Your self-confidence may have taken a hit from the break up and the painful things your ex have probably said to you when he or she broke up with you. You need to realize that just because your ex broke up with you, that doesn’t mean that you are not loveable and that you won’t find someone who will love you.

Third, check out How To Get Ex Back. Good luck!